Baby bump

18 weeks today. Feeling more excited now.

My vague abdo discomfort and lack of bowel movements are much improved. I dont know if its because I’m in 2nd trimester (and supposedly symptoms should be improving) or because I’ve learnt how to control my appetite. In the beginning, I was just eating and eating and eating. To be honest, I think it was because I let go of this ‘gate’ and went ‘Yeaay! I can eat whatever and however much I want not!’. The result was constant bloatedness….so now I know not to succumb to my nafs and eat smaller portions as long as I’m eating regularly (and oh yeah, am I eating regularly).

It seems like suddenly there’s all these women whose preggers as well (doctors, nurses, midwives). Is there something in the Kettring waters? Or perhaps I’ve just started to care for pregnant ladies out there? Anyway, I keep looking at their bumps and comparing with mine. You can’t really see mine when I wear scrubs but it is getting more obvious. For the first time in my life, I’m actually worried about my weight. I’ve gained 3 kilos, so i think that’s not bad. M on the other hand thinks I should be gaining more. I reckon this is like a marathon of gaining weight…you need to build your pace and then all out in the end.

(I’m also ultra worried of stretch marks hence this theory of ‘steady pace’ of weight gain and putting on all kinds of cocoa butter ointments on me)

Other random things:

1. I’ve started thinking of what I’m going to wear when I deliver. Random much? Confident lagi tu that I’ll actually have the time to tukar baju to what I plan to wear.

2. Sorting out my maternity leave currently. Talked to the boss and she recommends taking it earlier (around 30-34 weeks) than I planned. Like mid Oct??? That’s SOON! I don’t want to go too early but then how would I know if I can cope it then or not? I feel fine right now and I know things will get worse and I’ll be tired and god knows how 12 hours shifts will be.

Bleep: Labour ward calling for paeds.
Me: Coming guys! *waddles to Labour ward* Ohh baby’s out already, sorry! Should have called me 30 minutes earlier.

3. I have found 2 white (It hurst to say grey and it DOES look white) hair this week. This is bit disconcerting.

From BBC website: “So what causes some women to turn grey earlier than others? Prematurely grey hair has long being associated with stress or a traumatic experience, which in this age of fast cars, mobile phones and highly driven businesswomen juggling careers and families, seems a perfectly viable reason….. Having grey hair does not mean your diet is lacking or that you are stressed. There is no other exacting underlying factor. Premature greyness is genetic and unfortunately there are no ways of reversing it.”

Oh ok, can’t blame on stress then.

Lastly, a wise reader has said – I shouldn’t stress too much at this time. And she’s right. So in the last 2 weeks or so, I’ve been trying not to get work to get to me. When things get stressy, I think of our Little Jumping Bean (as it’s been jumping around in the scans), and realise there IS a bigger picture. I think this last year, work has been in my head way too much and now I’m realising that there’s other things in life to focus on, and rightly so.

Love, me

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