Yesterday was the first day meeting with the midwife. Granted I’m already 13 weeks plus and a bit late for a booking appointment (well, its never too late to book yourself with the midwife me thinks … unless it’s like on the due date!). I say a bit late because it means I’ve missed my time for one of the screening scan.
Now not wanting to drop this like a bombshell to those who doesn’t know it already. But I’m pregnant *await cooing and squeals from the women*. I’ve known it for awhile but have been feeling very cautious about it. But as of 2 days ago, I am now 13 weeks, meaning the risk of miscarriage has dropped. I can now breathe a little better. I dont know….I think all this insiders medical knowledge is making me extra cautious and a bit in denial too.
Or perhaps it’s the fact that I haven’t got much symptoms. Aside from feeling easily bloated and constipated (oh yeah, I can talk about my bowel movements – or lack of it – for hours), I can forget that I’m pregnant. Which is bad really.
I’ve realised how bad I am at taking care of myself at work. Last saturday was the first day on-call since my holiday and wow, how tired am I. It was expectedly busy and non-stop. I didn’t have time to stop for lunch or pray – the thing that kept me going were the walkers slightly salted crisp (cos the vending machine didnt have anything else) and cadbury chocolate bar to eat in between baby checks.
When I finally finished at 10pm, I realise this weird sensation on my tummy which is my bladder telling me it wants to go. So not only have I not eaten the whole day (aside from above snacks), I’ve also not passed urine for 10 hours. When I told the midwife I worked with this, she gave me a big motherly telling off for not drinking enough.
I guess I’ve accepted this as a norm whilst working. I’m not the only one who would miss lunch AND dinner whilst working a 12 hour shift and then realise at the end of the day, that you’ve not drank or had a wee for all those time either. Now this of course is not healthy lifestyle *wags fingers at myself and other drs* nor should it be tolerated or considered acceptable. I try to encourage my juniors to stop working during lunchtime because the work will not stop so you might as well feed yourself. But who am I to say, because I do that too.
But I guess now I have to remember to take care of myself. Eat and drink regularly, with a varied diet (ie more vegs and fruits :s ) and rest well too.
Oh not only the physical side, I went a bit hormonal too on my weekend on call. It feels like something (an irate patient’s mum, challenges from colleagues) could easily tip me off and I get upset 😦
Ohhhh, I don’t know how I’m going to do it once I get bigger – and trust me, I’ll be waddling. I am (saying it kindly to myself) petite and therefore WILL waddle. I’ll be a waddling emotional wreck, gaaaah!
Ya Allah, help me in my coming weeks and months, give me strength and ease me throughout these months, Amin.